Thursday 19 January 2012

The rules of attraction

These days, people write songs about almost anything in the world.

For a while, i stopped listening to secular songs, hoping to avoid the ache in my heart. It's as if, for every relationship (that includes friendships), every event, every special moment, there's a song that sings the words in our hearts. and there really is, isn't there? :)


I'm glad that i can now embrace the songs i once avoided. that they remind me not of the hurt, but of the beautiful memories we've created together.

anyway! this is a really nice song i came across. no, not that it sings the words in my heart. that's not the only reason why pple fall in love with songs!








Today has been a great day. just being reminded that no matter the choices we make, God's will will be done anyway. (nope, not a typo). The beautiful thing about life is that God blesses us with free choice. But sometimes we're tempted to use that free choice to disobey God. when that happens, one embarks on the treacherous journey which will eventually lead us to the very same place if we had obeyed God. except that, on so many levels, obeying God is more comfort and less pain.

So, am i prepared to step out of my comfort zone in order to honour God?




Monday 9 January 2012

Almost Goodbye.

It's almost time to say goodbye again! The day didn't start off too well, i'm falling ill again. but thankfully, i had good company. HTHT, mini shopping trip. great way to take my mind off everything! excited bout my new purchases! and mad excited about the haircut i'll be getting tmr!

Feel so blessed to have friends who never fail to cheer me up. friends who stand by me, even when I'm the ybee that overthinks, the ybee that feels too much, the complex ybee who has too many stories to tell.

Thank God for the special people who are willing to sit next to me and just, be there.

Thank God for friends who know me, and love me anyway.




I can't believe my 4 weeks back in Singapore has passed by so quickly. Thank God for new encounters with Him during my time back home. Thank God for new opportunities to grow in Him, for new friendships He has so graciously blessed me with. Thank God for helping me build stronger bonds in church. Thank God for setbacks that bring me closer to Him. Thank God for what He has done and what He is about to do, especially in 2012. Am so, so encouraged by what i heard at church on Sunday. so amazing to feel an outpouring of love from God. i love feeling special to God. I love feeling so loved and treasured. Man's love may fail but God's love will never. My heart belongs to God alone.

this trip home has been truly amazing.

Most thankful for
1) amazingg times at church, especially with E and M!
2) awesome possum study/bonding times with B and G
3) met G's L!
4) met E's P!
5) hthts with P and C
6) Christmas, New years and Daddy's birthday with family
etccccccc.


very thankful for blossoming friendships over the course of the past month!


thank God for being my shield and my shelter, my hope and my one true desire.

Saturday 7 January 2012

It wasn't a coincidence that Esther met up with me in the afternoon today. Definitely wasn't a coincidence that i read it only today when the email was sent out yesterday. it was God's way of reassuring me. His way of telling me that He knows what i'm struggling with and He feels the pain i feel.

I'm not strong enough but by God's grace, the strength that He has given me has sustained me so far. I'm surprised that i did not shed a tear.

The only way I can be free of these negative feelings that are weighing me down is if i commit them to God and trust that He will provide. How can i not, when He has brought me out of my darkest times? God's plans for me are perfect and pleasing and i need only to know that.

I have no clue what my next step is. It scares me just thinking about the possible options. But God is bigger than any of these worries or issues that stand in my way. to get out of this emotional roller coaster, I have to trust with all my heart.




i'm sorry that i struggle to open up. i'm sorry that i choose to turn away. i'm sorry that even when you guys showed me love, i didn't dare to reach out. i really am. but i'm so, so thankful for all of you. i truly am.